well, beyond all expectations, I got a reply to my email and I have closure on my issues of being ignored... I do have a complex, I have to admit that... I've been in relationships of all sorts where people have just up and ignored me and/or disappeared completely, so I almost expect it nowadays... slight paranoia perhaps... ok, more than slight, it happens in every relationship... sigh... so clearing the hurdle and becoming friends with someone and moving beyond that takes some effort on my part... anyway, this time, I actually got a reply (first time ever in these damned "I'm ignoring you or I've become invisible" cases) and for the first time, I feel good ad I've gotten closure... still feel crappy in some senses, but I'm a world better... I have hope at least that they aren't all going to do exactly the same thing over and over again... that's a plus :)
bloody closure, I can't figure out why my mind demands it... it's in everything... I watch a movie or a TV show, I must see the end, even if it sucks... otherwise it bugs the hell outta me... same with a book, I have to finish it, or it drives me crazy... same thing with so many things that I do... closure, why is it so integral to my being and when I don't get it why does my mind go into spin cycle? fucking silly neurotic tendencies...
anyway, it's a new day, a new week and at least one issue is laid to rest... 473 million to go... :)
