The epitome of subservience to our per overlords is well illustrated in the description of a scene played out in a small park with a man and a dog. The man stands watching the dog and pleads insistently for the dog to do its business. The simple phrase, "Would you please just shit" is uttered repeatedly, but the dog happily ignores the mans desperate entreatment. The supplication of the inferior party is uttered in vain, as the pet overlord demonstrates its dominance in the greater scheme of the social order.
Sadly, that man was me this morning. After 25 minutes of trying to convince her to shit, I gave up. The saddest part is that after asking for shit so vehemently, I'm almost assured that I will find all the shit I want on the floor when I get home from work this evening.
Last, but not least, when I attempt to clean up whatever shit is on the floor, there's a very good chance the dog will get nervous because she did something 'bad' and piss all over the place.
Fuck this shit, I'm moving to New Zealand.
